Calling All Malingering, Gossiping, Inept and Boring People!
Training is supposed to be helpful and focused on motivation, improvement and expanded thinking. I think my training and presentations accomplish that–but the people who really need the training are never there. All the participants in my classes are incredibly high performing people who are carrying the load for everyone else and who are great team members while constantly striving to be an example of excellence and service.
I’m not complaining, because I almost always really, really like everyone in my classes–I truly do! But, I also would like to talk to a few of those people I’m always hearing about. For example, I want to meet these types:
Drama Queens (I’ll even settle for Kings). I know there are Drama Queens because I hear about them all the time, but they never come to anything I teach. The people who tell me about how vicious and evil their coworkers are and how they almost throw up every time they have to work with one and how that has been true in almost every place they have worked, have said those are the people who fit the description of Drama Royalty. However, so far I’ve been out of luck on meeting any of them.
Speaking of vicious and evil–where are those people when I’m teaching? I don’t want to have a demonic spawn of satan in every class. Nevertheless, since so many coworkers and bosses are described to me as being evil, vile, malevolent or sadistic, you’d think just one of them would give me a break and attend training now and then. But noooooooooo…I only get people who are nurturing, supportive and pleasant in spite of provocation. Sure, I love’em, but a little variety would be fun.
Are you unethical, uninspired, unenthused and disloyal? Send me your email and I’ll give you a discount on my next class. I want to meet you! I have met and admired many participants who are above reproach in every aspect of their work life and I’d like to see what the weasels they work with look like.
Lazy malingerers who lie and gossip apparently never get sent to training for any topic at all and never volunteer to attend. Instead, the rosters get filled with hard working people who speak up when they hear gossip or see unfairness and put a halt to it right away. They’re the same considerate people who never forward virus warnings or talk on a cell phone while driving–and their kids were never allowed to act-up like some of the brats you see in stores nowadays. No wonder I have a fun time teaching–I’ve got the cream of the crop in front of me!
I guess one reason I like all the participants in my classes so much is because they are like I always was in my career–diligently doing their best but held back by incompetent supervisors, managers who don’t have a clue, and weak, spineless so-called leaders. I feel a kinship with every one of them.
Still, in the introductions I would like to have someone openly admit they are treacherous, diabolical backstabbers or even just boring, milk-toast, managers who are afraid of their own shadows. If you aren’t practically perfect, please sign-up for a class or two. Why be content to make life horrible in your workplace when you could have a captive audience and a trainer to practice on?
See you soon, I hope!