Personal Style or Pain in the Neck?
Each of us has a unique style based on an infinite number of contributing factors. A personal and professional challenge for each of us is to be what seems comfortable and right to us, without creating problems. A manager’s job is to work with the unique styles of all employees as much as possible. What should be the limit to those efforts?
1. When an employee’s quirks, traits, appearance or actions disrupt work or harm the work product or the organization. A manager’s responsibility is to be alert for the very first indicators of problems and to take action immediately to ensure the employee corrects them.
In some work places one or a few employees have been disruptive for weeks, months or years! Of course, the employee should have enough sensitivity and awareness to see what he or she is doing and change it. And, coworkers should have enough confidence and conviction to do something about the things that bother them. But, ultimately whose responsibility is it?
2. When unreasonable adjustments have to be made. If allowing the employee to work within his or her personal style would require adjustments of performance or behavior standards or the work environment, or an unreasonable tolerance by coworkers, the manager must ensure the employee adjusts to fit into the bigger picture, not the other way around.
Each of us wants the freedom to incorporate our personalities, preferences, experiences, knowledge and skills into our work. An effective manager faciliates individuality as much as possible. Nevertheless, all employees should be hired, evaluated and retained based on their performance and behavior—and part of that involves adapting personal styles to the larger work environment.
The bottom line: It is possible for everyone to be comfortable within their personal styles, while not imposing those styles on others unreasonably. However, “That’s just the way he is”, is never a reason for tolerating ineffective performance or behavior.
Do you know someone who creates many problems at work and everyone else makes adjustments to deal with that person? Who is that employee’s supervisor or manager? I hope it isn’t you.
November 27th, 2009
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Challenging and Problematic People, Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers, Supervision and Management |
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Whether you are a manager, supervisor or member of a work team, make it a habit to connect with others when you arrive and leave–and in between times too. There may be times when you must rush in or rush out (or when you want to slip in the door and slip out without being seen) but limit those times and don’t let them be the norm. Be part of your work group and let your presence and absence have significance.
Be brief: A greeting at the beginning of work and a farewell before leaving only requires a few friendly words. During the work period, when you come into a work areas, say hello or give a friendly smile or nod of the head, according to the work being done. The idea is to be courteous–and it is discourteous or at least uncivil to not acknowledge those with whom you work.
You should not engage each person in lengthy conversation, interrupt their activities or require more response than they wish to offer. I mention that because I know many people who prefer to hunker down with work, so a very brief greeting is all that is welcome. The brightly smiling coworker who wants to spread good cheer every morning is dreaded and resented, not appreciated!
Be friendly: An unsmiling face makes a greeting or farewell seem robotic and insincere. You don’t have to grin or act insincerely friendly, just smile slightly and make eye contact as you say hello or goodbye.
Be personal: It’s possible to say hello and goodbye to an entire office or group-and some work settings make that more logical than stopping at each work space. However, even then, try to make eye contact with everyone and don’t exclude anyone. Don’t play favorites and especially don’t exclude anyone with whom you may have conflicts. Present yourself to that person and others as open and friendly in spite of disagreements.
Be positive: Work is tough enough without greetings and farewells that sound as though you are in a hell-hole of misery and tomorrow will be more of the same! Everything that seems so troubling or stressful will soon fade into distant memory, so keep that perspective for yourself and share it through your positive facial expressions and words. Keep the approach that with everyone’s best efforts, your group can achieve anything. During the day, if you are busy and preoccupied, it takes no more energy to smile and say hello than it does to sigh heavily and sigh “hullo” as though the weight of the world is on you!
Be appreciative: The value of appreciation is two-fold: You have to develop the habit of noticing things for which you should be appreciative, and you reinforce the good actions of others when you thank them or share your appreciation with them.
Thank people for helping you during the day. If you are a manager, thank employees for things they may not have realized you noticed. Thank your supervisor or manager for his or her assistance. If you see someone who helped your work group, thank him or her as you are leaving. No one resents a thank you!
Be purposeful: Not long ago I was present when a manager was leaving work and said to the employees in his area, “Thank you all for your work today! Have a good evening and I’ll see you tomorrow!” The employees all looked up briefly, smiled and said goodnight.
The employee who was helping me said, “He is so nice. He says goodbye every night. One night he left in a hurry and called back so he could say goodnight to us!” The employee was still smiling as she continued her work, which multiplied the positive effects of that brief farewell.
A manager in a police dispatch area told me she often walked through the area and stopped briefly at several consoles to see what was going on, but didn’t say anything for fear of being disruptive. Finally, one of the communications officers told her it was unnerving to have her walk by and look but not say anything at all. She resolved it by telling everyone that she was checking work as part of her job but in the future she would smile and at least nod when she did it! She said she felt a bit obvious at first, but got over that and could see the dispatchers appreciated her efforts.
Say hello and goodbye every work day. You will never regret it and you will find it to be a great way to add to the spirit of camaraderie and your own influence and relationships.
November 7th, 2009
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Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers, Supervision and Management |
9 comments
Not long ago I was introduced to an organization called Smile & Move. You can find out about the concept and get nifty tips and products here. The information and advice is certainly needed! The next time you are observing a crowd, office or business, notice how few people smile–and how lethargic many of them act about work. Those uninspired images should be a good reminder to look and act pleasant and to show enthusiasm and a willingness to help others.
The honey bee is the traditional example of cheerful industry. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a bee grin but I’ve watched bees work and it is fascinating to see how thorough they are as they buzz between, over and in flowers. However, buzzing around like a bee at work is not necessarily a positive thing. It can be irritating and often makes work more difficult.
The problems with excessive buzzing around at work:
*Hyperactivity can seem out of control and overly dramatic.
*Rushed, worried talking can give the impression of being overwhelmed.
*Hurried work leads to mistakes, accidents and misunderstandings.
*When the behavior is chronic it seems manic rather than admirable.
*Other employees resent having to deal with the uproar and panic that seems to often accompany an excessively active person.
Another problem is that being busy as a bee can become egotistical and self-serving. It’s easy to use multi-tasking and busy, busy, busyness as a way to slyly attempt to show others up: “Thank goodness I’m working so hard, since no one else is. I’m such a saint.” Sometimes hectic people make a habit of sharing their long lists of tasks with others. No one is impressed and in fact, they become even more resentful.
Calm down. If you know you tend to buzz around, purposely calm down.
- Move a bit slower to avoid the appearance you are wogging everywhere you go.
- Stop now and then to regain your composure and self control.
- Realize that everyone else is probably working hard too, so don’t create more problems for them with your obsessiveness.
- Don’t recite your list of tasks to others.
- Consider reducing the list and learning to deal with your time and work more effectively.
Smile and move with purpose and composure. Isn’t that the way you want to be viewed by others?
Check out the Smile & Move website, then use it to help yourself have a positive attitude and take positive action–without bouncing or buzzing off the walls.
July 28th, 2009
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Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers |
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Bluetooth technology, headsets and speaker phones have made it possible to talk on the phone while reading, word processing, eating, walking, driving or just about anything else. But, it very often sounds incredibly rude.
Reading email and commenting on it while talking to someone else.
“Yes, I agree that we should probably reschedule that for next….WHAT THE HECK? Why are they sending me THIS? ……………………I’m sorry, I was looking at an email I got from Dave and his crew. They’re always copying me on things I don’t need. It’s nuts!………..Yeah, I think we should reschedule that.”
Eating while talking on the phone.
”We were trying to (chomp, chomp, chomp) get that done in time for the (indistinguishable), but I (chomp, slurp, slurp, chomp) don’t think we’ll have it. Is that a problem? (chomp, sip, crunch.)”
Browsing the Internet and not listening to the caller.
Traci: I’ve interviewed both of the employees but it seems they each have a different story. It’s so frustrating!
Joe: (silence)
Traci: Are you there?
Joe: Oh! Yes, yes I’m here. Hey, awhile ago you mentioned the problem you were having with opening that file….I just found a website about it. It says you should probably close other programs before trying to download the file.
Working on email.
Roger: I just wanted to give you a heads up about the plans.
Maria: I’ll…….be……..sure…….to…………………………………..get…… (click) those done.
Roger: Am I catching you at a bad time?
Maria: No, no that’s fine. I was just sending an email to Bill and had to attach a file. Now, run that by me again.
Doing something that requires you to talk to someone else while on the phone.
“Hi Craig! How are you? I wanted to ask you if we could use the conference room to……just a minute…..A LARGE SLAMBURGER, DIET COLA AND SUPER SIZE THE FRIES PLEASE!……Sorry, I’m getting something to eat. Anyway, I was….just minute……YES, DIET COLA. THANKS! ….anyway, I was wondering if we could use the….ohhhh, just one more minute, I’m sorry, I’m almost done with this……I DON’T NEED THE PENNIES BACK. THANK YOU!…OK, I’m done now (slurp) so, anyway, can we use the conference room?”
A communication and courtesy challenge: Challenge yourself–if it’s a challenge—to keep your hands off the keyboard, stop browsing the Internet, stop reading and sending email, stop eating, stop sounding preoccupied and only halfway paying attention, stop commenting on things apart from the phone call. Focus on the conversation, both talking and listening. It’s Communication 101. It’s also Courtesy 101.
June 13th, 2009
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Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers, Training, Technology, Blogs, A/V etc. |
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Make a habit of noticing your habits.
Behavioral and communication habits are often like tics–we do them as a spasm of movement or sound rather than on purpose. Repeated movement and vocal or sub-vocal habits are noticeable enough to others that they start focusing on those things. If you have a controllable habit that is distracting or irritating, you will do yourself and others a favor by eliminating it.
I want to be sure to emphasize that I am not referring to to tics that are neurological or psychological in origin. I’m strictly referring to habits that can be controlled–which refers to most of the habits we have, from twirling eye glasses while we talk on the phone to tapping out a rhythm with a pen, to squinting and making a weird face when we’re concentrating–and all the other habitual behaviors you can describe.
Even relatively benign words, phrases, sounds and actions become irritating after about three times in a few minutes or if it is noticeable every time you communicate. In an office setting or close work areas, repeated unnecessary behaviors and sounds can be tremendously distracting and can lead to anger and ongoing conflicts. Most of the time these can be controlled–although, as with any habit, it is not easy.
1. Purposely notice your own habitual behavior. Become aware of repeated actions. The moment you do some of the more typical habitual actions, notice it and see if you repeat it. If you do, make yourself stop. If you cannot stop on your own, you may have a medical or neurological issue that needs attention. Among those habits are repeatedly touching the face, hair or clothes, scratching, tugging on the ear lobe, nose, throat, neck, lips or hair, as well as all the vocal habits that can make others uncomfortable and frustrated with you.
2. Listen to yourself and monitor repetitious sounds, words and phrases. You should be aware enough of what you are saying to be able to notice when you are repeating something. Examples include words and phrases (like, Doh!, Awesome, OK, Ummmmmm , You know, and similar exclamations or space fillers) as well as sub-vocal sounds such as coughing, sniffing, snorting, lip smacking, nervous laughs or chuckles, or anything else that others hear you say or do repeatedly.
Here are some general guidelines to avoid habits that irritate others in a workplace (or anyplace else for that matter.)
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Keep your hands off your face, clothes and body unless it is absolutely necessary to touch, adjust or scratch something. If it’s necessary, do it then stop and don’t do it again. If it’s a real problem, leave the area and do what you have to do before you return.
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Don’t make unnecessary noises. Unless you are speaking in a purposeful way your noises, sighing, singing, humming, gum cracking or chewing or other sounds are not communicating anything positive.
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Don’t twist, wrinkle or screw up your face. Your face is what people are looking at while you talk. When you distort it or contort it habitually, you lessen your ability to communicate and leave a very unpleasant memory.
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Don’t move around without a purpose. Leg shaking, finger snapping, head movement, neck twisting and other movements are very noticeable and become nerve wracking to others very quickly.
3. Have a friend mimic you or tell you about your habits. I’ve mentioned this before and know it is difficult and not for the sensitive. However, it is one way to know what others are noticing about you. Ask a friend to help you by pointing out even the most seemingly minor habit or repetitious behavior. Your friend will probably assure you it’s not a real problem. But, if it’s noticeable enough to remember, it’s a problem.
4. Don’t make excuses for your distracting habits, just stop them. None of us like to admit that we have a distracting habit, so it is easy to try to reduce embarrassment by explaining it away to make it seem as though the other person is being hyper-critical. However, there really is no explanation the justifies being irritating, distracting or offensive to others, when it is within our power to control it–which is usually the case.
A supervisor habitually picked at the hair in his moustache. (Almost everyone with a moustache or beard habitually touches it and irritates the heck out of everyone else–which is why I don’t have one.) When his boss asked him to stop because several people at meetings had commented on how distracting it was, the supervisor said he knew it was irritating but it wasn’t really a habit. He explained that when he talked it tended to make the moustache hair get unkempt so he was smoothing it down and straightening it out. That is a pretty desperate excuse!
Even tics associated with Tourette Syndrome (TD), a neurological disorder, can often be treated with medication or self-management techniques to reduce the repetitive behaviors. If you do not have that kind of condition, you should feel grateful and resolve to show more control over the things you can control, since others may not have that good fortune.
5. Focus on positive methods and habits. If you can establish some positive habits they might help you replace the less effective ones. For example, an employee told me he had a habit of constantly humming or whistling under his breath as he walked through the office area and someone had commented on it. He replaced that with a focus on observing, smiling and talking to people or just walking silently with good posture and a professional demeanor. He said he never realized how habitual his humming or whistling had become, until he had to stop himself several times in one trek through the office!
The bottom line:When you communicate with others you are presenting yourself in a direct way. You want them to see you as positively as possible. When you are not directly communicating with others, you can still be observed and heard, and that sends a powerful message about you as well. Be purposeful about what you say and do. You will soon get over feeling self-conscious about it and you will develop more positive habits of posture, conversation, movement and expressions. Those are the kind of habits that make you a welcomed addition to any group.
March 2nd, 2009
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Assessment Centers and Interviews, Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers |
6 comments
Do you have Gold Standards for your work behavior and performance?
A few months ago, several of us celebrated Shannon Rowe McCorison’s birthday with dinner at Elway’s at the Ritz-Carlton in downtown Denver. Shannon had worked with the staff there because of a ProLogis event she had managed, and wanted to go when she and Casey could relax and enjoy the time.
The Ritz-Carlton was formerly an Embassy Suites and I wanted to see how the renovations looked. I also wanted to see if this Ritz-Carlton was living up to the Ritz-Carlton service standards that have created an unrivaled reputation among hotel chains. And, I wanted to try out the steaks at Elway’s, a John Elway owned steakhouse/restaurant. There is another one in Cherry Creek. However, since this one is in the Ritz-Carlton, the Ritz-Carlton Gold Standard applies for the dining experience. Reviews have been great for the restaurant as well as the hotel.
This isn’t a food review–although the food was excellent. The important thing to me was seeing the evidence of Ritz-Carlton service, as exemplified by:
•Damian Jenkins, General Manager (highly professional and warmly charming!)
Jens, our lead server,
Lee, another server.
Michael Casey–the outstanding sommelier, who was not present but who sent champagne for a birthday toast,
Tim, the sommelier who helped us with wine choices during the dinner,
The dozen or so helpful staff members of the hotel and the restaurant, whose names I don’t know. They opened doors, greeted us warmly, and generally made us–and the hundred or so other people who were in the entrance, lobby, gift shop and restaurant areas–feel like honored guests.
Every time I have been in a Ritz-Carlton I have been impressed. The Ritz-Carlton in downtown Denver certainly fulfilled the Gold Standards that night.
I’m going to cut and paste what the Ritz-Carlton website says about their Gold Standards, so you can have a template of sorts for creating similar standards for your personal work.
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Our Gold Standards are the foundation of the Ritz-Carlton Hotel Company, L.L.C. They encompass the values and philosophy by which we operate and include:
The Credo
The Motto
The Three Steps of Service
Service Values
The 6th Diamond
The Employee Promise
The Credo
The Ritz-Carlton Hotel is a place where the genuine care and comfort of our guests is our highest mission.
We pledge to provide the finest personal service and facilities for our guests who will always enjoy a warm, relaxed, yet refined ambience.
The Ritz-Carlton experience enlivens the senses, instills well-being, and fulfills even the unexpressed wishes and needs of our guests.
Motto
At The Ritz-Carlton Hotel Company, L.L.C., “We are Ladies and Gentlemen serving Ladies and Gentlemen.” This motto exemplifies the anticipatory service provided by all staff members.
Three Steps Of Service
- A warm and sincere greeting. Use the guest’s name.
- Anticipation and fulfillment of each guest’s needs.
- Fond farewell. Give a warm good-bye and use the guest’s name.
Service Values: I Am Proud To Be Ritz-Carlton
- I build strong relationships and create Ritz-Carlton guests for life.
- I am always responsive to the expressed and unexpressed wishes and needs of our guests.
- I am empowered to create unique, memorable and personal experiences for our guests.
- I understand my role in achieving the Key Success Factors, embracing Community Footprints and creating The Ritz-Carlton Mystique.
- I continuously seek opportunities to innovate and improve The Ritz-Carlton experience.
- I own and immediately resolve guest problems.
- I create a work environment of teamwork and lateral service so that the needs of our guests and each other are met.
- I have the opportunity to continuously learn and grow.
- I am involved in the planning of the work that affects me.
- I am proud of my professional appearance, language and behavior.
- I protect the privacy and security of our guests, my fellow employees and the company’s confidential information and assets.
- I am responsible for uncompromising levels of cleanliness and creating a safe and accident-free environment.
The 6th Diamond
Mystique
Emotional Engagement
Functional
The Employee Promise
At The Ritz-Carlton, our Ladies and Gentlemen are the most important resource in our service commitment to our guests.
By applying the principles of trust, honesty, respect, integrity and commitment, we nurture and maximize talent to the benefit of each individual and the company.
The Ritz-Carlton fosters a work environment where diversity is valued, quality of life is enhanced, individual aspirations are fulfilled, and The Ritz-Carlton Mystique is strengthened.
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Wouldn’t we be impressive if we had Gold Standards of this magnitude–and lived up to them? Consider what your credo and motto would be. What would be your steps to service? What would make you worthy of the 6th diamond in your behavior, work performance and group contributions? Make your name one of those–like the Ritz-Carlton–which says it all when someone is talking about excellence.
January 25th, 2009
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Food, Fitness, Fun, Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers |
4 comments
Whether we are talking on the phone or in person, people can tell if we’re not really listening. We indicate it in our lack of eye contact, our preoccupied tone of voice and our lack of responses to the one who is speaking to us. It’s very irritating and hurtful to someone when the person who is supposed to be listening is obviously not doing so.
That is why communications with customers and clients, coworkers, friends and family, requires effective listening. Active listening is a communications concept that includes restating the remarks of the other person to ensure accuracy of understanding. That’s a good idea–although not easy to do without sounding contrived. Another way to ensure understanding and to demonstrate our interest in what the other person is saying is to listen with intention.
- Look interested (without staring the other person down or glaring at them).
- Use encouraging comments (without being excessive).
- Ask questions (without sounding as though you are interrogating the other person.
Do you see a pattern there? Moderation is needed in listening as in everything else. You’ll know that if you recall talking to someone who made noises and exclamations throughout, or who made such close eye contact you felt uncomfortable.
All you have to do to listen with intention is to intend to listen.
Make a commitment to give people your undivided attention when they talk to you:
- Put down your work when a customer or coworker comes over to talk to you.
- Turn away from the computer when a subordinate or colleague needs to ask a question or discuss a concern.
- Don’t keep typing or browsing on the Internet when you’re talking on the phone–people can tell you aren’t really paying attention.
You’ll find you are better able to respond to people when you fully understand what they have said–and what they have not said. The nuances of communication can only be noticed when you are paying close attention–with intention. Try it and see how people react to having you obviously listening to them. Notice also how you feel when others obviously arent. Make intentional listening part of your customer service habits as well as your habit in building a positive relationship at work and at home.
October 10th, 2008
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Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers |
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No matter what your job you serve many people:
•Clients and customers
•Coworkers and colleagues
•Managers and supervisors
•Family and friends
•Anyone who needs your assistance or the knowledge and skills you can provide
•Anyone to whom you represent your company, section or department
The next time you are given a task or asked to help; when you answer the phone or respond to an email; when you have the chance to go above and beyond expectations: Think of it as providing customer service. Act as though this one customer is the most important one you will ever have. It may be true!
Don’t let “The customer is always right” be a barrier to your customer service philosophy. That’s a hackneyed line that never really made sense anyway. You don’t have to be obsequious and groveling or bowing to internal or external customers. Just be friendly, courteous and as helpful as you can be. When things don’t go smoothly–and they often will not–the customer service attitude will still be helpful and will keep you from making the cutting remark you’re thinking or will keep you from giving in when you should state your case. Instead, you will be open and honest about your feelings, but in an appropriate way.
What if everyone who helps you in a restaurant or store treated you like you treat others? Would they feel like a valued customer or as though they are stupid, a waste of time, an irritant, too demanding or someone of whom you are afraid?
While you’re thinking about that, reflect on this: Not only are you a service provider, you are a customer for everyone with whom you interact at work. What kind of customer service have you received lately?
August 4th, 2008
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Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers |
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It seems obvious that we must open our mouths to speak, but many people forget that number one rule. They have good thoughts, creative ideas, sharp wit, and something worthwhile to say, but they lose 90 percent of their impact because they don’t open their mouths enough to get the words out. It is almost impossible to be viewed as dynamic, strong, confident and capable if your words are muffled, mumbled or muttered.
It is also almost impossible to work effectively with a customer or client if you are looking down, mumbling, or sounding disinterested or merely mouthing words that have no significance for you. (Like, “Can I help you?”, said with a tone that would sound OK coming from a robot but not from someone who really wants to help.)
This rule about opening your mouth, is crucial for people who are working with customers and clients, being interviewed, taking Assessment Centers, leading meetings, speaking on behalf of a project, or just conversing every day.
Opening your mouth and using your lung-power to project your words allows you to project your thoughts, which is why you were talking in the first place. We used to call that verbal projection, and it was the focus of speech and drama classes and part of the study of elocution. It should be part of the personal and professional development of anyone who wants to be effective and successful.
- Opening your mouth to project your words is easier to do when you are looking up and forward, with your posture comfortably erect, rather than having your head down and your shoulders and body slumped–a much more effective look as well as sound.
- Opening your mouth and projecting your words increases the amount of facial expression you have and the level of energy you convey.
- Speaking up and out gains the attention of listeners.
- Projecting your words reduces just one more distraction for listeners–and most listeners need as few distractions as possible.
- When you open your mouth and speak clearly and distinctly, you are less likely to use irritating fillers in your conversation–umm, ahhh, errr–and you will reduce subvocal sounds that are distracting: Coughs, hacks, chokes, nervous laughing, sniffs and throat clearing.
I’m not talking about a tongue, teeth and tonsil display. Nor do you need to be like Demosthenes, the Greek orator, who was reputed to practice speaking with pebbles in his mouth until he could speak clearly around them. You just need to hold your chin up a bit more, open your mouth a bit more, look more directly at your listeners, put more air into your lungs and project your voice a bit more–nothing dramatic or over-done, just clear speech.
Perhaps the best way to ensure clear speech is this: Have something worthwhile to say and have the desire and commitment to say it effectively. If you can’t or don’t speak up and speak out, you may never be fully valued, and never get to achieve all of which you are capable. If you make effective articulation a habit, your next big goal is to make sure your words are effective as well. There is no point in opening your mouth to speak more clearly, if you only make it easier put your foot into it!
February 12th, 2008
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Assessment Centers and Interviews, Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers |
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