- A Casey McCorison photograph: Costa Rica 2009
Have you ever been buzzing around at work, taking care of business (you thought), figuring things were going OK and that you were on track with your professional relationships, your career and your reputation, when—zap!–you were hit by criticism, an attack you never expected or a negative event of crisis proportions in your life or career?
Have you ever been responsible for giving an employee bad news about work, administering a disciplinary action or intervening about behavior or performance that must be corrected immediately? Have you ever investigated something and realized the end result was going to be negative for an employee? Have you ever inadvertently or purposely snapped back at someone unexpectedly or used your influence or authority to thwart them in something they were trying to do that you didn’t like or didn’t think was right?
Many of us have experienced going to work and thinking things seemed fine–but by the end of the day everything had changed for the worse. It can be a frightening, upsetting and life shaking experience. Sometimes, like the photo above, we are seen as the one who is responsible for the turn of events and sometimes we are the one who gets stopped in our tracks. Either way it can have a long-term negative effect on how we feel about ourselves, others and work.
The situation may be so bad we can’t do anything but wait it out and hold on to the reality that something else will overshadow it eventually. However, we always can improve things to some degree if we focus on our work, our personal and professional missions and keeping lines of communication open. Never build a wall around yourself thinking that will keep the discomfort out–it only traps it inside.
Edmund Burke (1729-1797) had some good advice about that. He was an Irish philosopher, statesman and political theorist who served in the House of Commons in Great Britain and contributed to many key political decisions. He has been quoted and admired by both conservatives and liberals, but found himself alternately applauded and reviled during his lifetime. He said,
Never despair; but if you do, work on in despair.
That advice may seem excessively simplistic when you find yourself under attack, trying to recover from a painful experience or trying to get your team, section, department or office back on track. However, it is the one bit of advice that will ensure you move through the situation and come out of it stronger and better.
Work on–and do your best work. Work on–and support others who are behaving and performing effectively. Work on–and reach out to those who are going through the same thing. Acknowledge your errors and apologize if it is appropriate; commit to improving your performance or behavior if that is needed; talk positively about the future. Work on with confidence the situation will pass and the good work you are doing will help it happen sooner.
In the world of birds and moths many things are deadly and permanent. In your world and mine, surprises, changes, jolts and shocks may happen regularly. The negative results can be lessened if you don’t despair. However, even if you do, keep your focus on how you want to be seen, what you want to achieve and what you can contribute.
July 31st, 2010
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TLR |
Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development |
8 comments
1970
These aren’t the worst of times, just as they are not the best of times. Without diminishing the severity of national and international problems, perhaps we can take some comfort–and gain some hope–from the fact that we have not only endured similar crises, we have survived and eventually thrived again. It is true that every crisis has the potential for weakening individuals and governments, but there is also an opportunity to gain strength, correct mistakes and build on successes.
Apply it to your life. The same concept applies to your workplace, community, church and family. There will be problems. The big test is how you respond to the problems. You can keep doing the same things as always, without being willing to adjust to changes. You can go the same heedless way you have in the past, hoping for a magical solution from someone else. Or, you can take control of your own fate as much as possible.
Do what you can do: Build your skills, eliminate harmful habits, gain influence, increase your credibility, use your time and energy more wisely, improve your health and fitness, enjoy life more and help others find happiness and success as well.
1984
You probably have very little control over many things that have an effect on your life, but you do have control over your behavior. You may not be able to make major changes at work but you can improve your own performance. You can’t make the whole world better but you can make your part of the world better. That’s not just a saccharine thought, it’s a truth you can depend upon–and one that will accomplish more than complaining, venting, or feeling helpless or morose.
In 2040 there will be magazine covers deploring the condition of the economy, uncovering a recent scandal in the White House, and announcing the high cost of health care, the lamentable status of education and the challenges of new technologies. (The desktop holographic images will be distracting at work and managers will discuss times past when employees were much more productive with those funny-looking devices called cellular telephones.)
2010 will soon be the good old days. Enjoy them while you can!
1974
July 23rd, 2010
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TLR |
Keeping On!, Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development |
9 comments
For Want Of A Nail
For want of a nail, a shoe was lost,
For want of a shoe, a horse was lost,
For want of a horse, a rider was lost,
For want of a rider, a message was lost,
For want of a message, a battle was lost,
For want of a battle, a kingdom was lost,
All for the want of a horseshoe nail.
Advice about workplace motivation often suggests purposely assigning a challenging task as a way to help an employee become more enthusiastic. It will probably be more useful to the employee and the organization to help him or her see that the regular work they were hired to do is worth doing and worth doing well.
When employees only feel energized when they are engaged in new, unique or special projects, there is a tendency to feel let-down when those projects are completed. Routine tasks then seem even less significant than before. Make it as worthwhile and satisfying for employees to do routine tasks well, as it is for them to accept and fulfill a great challenge.
While you are at it, remember that observing and acknowledging dependable, daily task accomplishment is part of your routine work–and just as valuable as a project that tests your abilities in a dramatic way.
You may never be responsible for leading the battle that saves the kingdom, or riding with the message that saves the battle, or even shoeing the horse that carries the rider. Nevertheless, do not underestimate the value of being the one who monitors the supply of nails.
July 15th, 2010
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TLR |
Personal and Professional Development, Supervision and Management |
6 comments
Spite and malice harms everyone and should be stopped.
Whether you are a manager, supervisor, employee, parent, sibling, friend or just want to be a decent human being, be on the alert for indicators of mean-spirited, petty, maliciously vile behavior. Don’t do it yourself and don’t ignore it in others.
The card game, Spite and Malice, has been around for a long time under a variety of names. It can be fun to play when played in the spirit of fun, even though it certainly appeals to the competitive spririt as well. It’s described on one site as “a game with attitude.” One reviewer commented on the fun of playing the “Stop anyone” card, when you see someone is on a winning streak. Another said, “This is a cutthroat game where you do what it takes to keep someone from winning, then they do it back to you.” The Hasboro card box says, “If you can’t beat’em, annoy’em.” It sounds like some workplaces I’ve heard about!
At work, these are often the indicators of spiteful, malicious behavior:
- Sarcastic, snide remarks to diminish someone or their work.
- Behavior or comments designed to make it difficult for someone to do their work effectively.
- Waiting until others are around to point out a mistake or problem.
- Doing something you know will result in a bad situation for someone else.
- Facial expressions, gestures, comments or actions that cause someone else to feel unwanted, disliked, or demeaned.
- Frequently ridiculing or mocking someone rather than talking to them directly about a problem or issue.
- Being an obstructionist and stubbornly resisting someone else, just to avoid complying or just to create a problem for them. (This is also a description of passive-aggressive behavior.)
- Stabbing someone in the back and twisting the knife. (That’s a high-level psychological phrase.)
Spiteful, malicious behavior is a clear indicator of ongoing contention that harms everyone, even those who are not the direct target. It uses time ineffectively and often results in long, long meetings or frequent cross-purpose conversations that get no positive results. It creates tension and ill-will. It’s nasty. Even if there is someone who seems to be deserving of a slap-down or a put-down or a straightening-up, it isn’t the appropriate way to improve things.
If you are a manger or supervisor and you hear or observe something that seems malicious or spiteful: Stop the behavior immediately, investigate it further and if you were correct in your observations, direct the employee to never do it again. Make it clear that the behavior was not useful, not professional and not acceptable. If there was provocation, deal with that as well. But, make sure the petty, vengeful behavior stops.
If you are the target of spite and malice: Don’t respond with more of it. Get it out in the open and let the other person know you heard it or felt it. See if you can deal with the underlying problem. Find out if you have created part of the problem. If that doesn’t help, document what happened and the effect it had on you and others and ask for assistance in getting it stopped. Don’t drop hints, act like a long-suffering victim or gossip about the other person, just ask for help in a reasonable way.
Some good comments when confronting directly:
“You say that as though you’re joking, but I don’t think you mean it that way. How do you mean it?”
“It seems as though you are purposely resisting this. Is it because of me or because of the idea or both?”
“It seems like there is some hidden message in what you’re saying. If you talk to me directly maybe we can get things in the open and deal with it.”
If you are tempted to be malicious or spiteful: One indicator of spite and malice is sneaky, behind the scenes, manipulative behavior designed to harm someone else. But you can also be nasty and mean right out in the open. A good test is this: What results are you trying to get?
If you are trying to make life difficult for someone else or trying to harm them or their work in some way, stop yourself before someone else has to stop you. Find the root cause for your feelings of anger or agression and deal with those issues.
The bottom line: No one ever looked more professional after showing spite or malice. No one has ever brought about positive changes through malicious or spiteful behavior. Stop it when you observe it and don’t do it yourself.
In card games it can be fun to block other players in every hand they play, while chortling to yourself or openly about it. At work, the stakes are too high to play those kind of games.
July 7th, 2010
Posted by
TLR |
Challenging and Problematic People, Personal and Professional Development, Supervision and Management |
9 comments
Fourth of July, 2010
The term Ship of State has been used as a metaphor for the governing body of a country since Plato wrote The Republic, in 380 B.C. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882) wrote a lengthy–and very metaphorical!–poem, Building the Ship, about the union of states that formed the United States.
The most well-known lines of that poem are the last few stanzas, which are particularly appropriate this 4th of July. There is no hysteria about how bad things are or might be in the future and there is no mean-spirited nastiness about the storms that shake the ship. There is only resoluteness, confidence and positive will. Even if you don’t usually read poetry, give this a try.
Building the Ship
Thou, too, sail on, O Ship of State!
Sail on, O Union, strong and great!
Humanity with all its fears,
With all the hopes of future years,
Is hanging breathless on thy fate!
We know what Master laid the keel,
What Workmen wrought thy ribs of steel,
Who made each mast, and sail, and rope,
What anvils rang, what hammers beat,
In what forge and what a heat
Were shaped the anchors of thy hope!
Fear not each sudden sound and shock,
‘Tis of the wave and not the rock;
‘Tis but the flapping of the sail,
And not a rent made by the gale!
In spite of rock and tempest’s roar,
In spite of false lights on the shore,
Sail on, nor fear to breast the sea!
Our hearts, our hopes, are all with thee,
Our hearts, our hopes, our prayers, our tears,
Our faith triumphant o’er our fears,
Are all with thee, – are all with thee!
Have a very fun–but thoughtful, hopeful and memory-making–July 4th, 2010!
July 2nd, 2010
Posted by
TLR |
Life and Work |
3 comments
