In the last week or so, I have had the pleasure of having dozens of people send me very nice notes requesting a document I had offered for free: Church Security Concerns: The Security Role of Greeters and Ushers. Almost every note commented on how much the writer appreciated my work on the material. I sent a PDF file and a short note and now am reaping the reward of many messages telling me how the document is being used. It’s been a great feeling!
What have you produced at work that others could use to make their life or work easier? If you have a letter or process template, share it with a few people. If you have found a way to make a routine task easier, let others know about it. If you wrote a document that would be useful in other organizations like yours, look for ways to get it to people in those organizations. I went through my email and culled addresses of people I thought would find the material on church security useful. Then, I sent a note to people who I thought might have a mailing list, and I asked them to put out a message with my email address. The results have been both astounding and interesting. Very much like viral marketing!
One way to develop your career and your reputation for being a valued resource, is to actually be a resource. Be proactive about it, and let people know you have something to offer. You may have the same positive–and fun–results I have had.
And if you want the PDF file on The Security Role of Greeters and Ushers, you know how to contact me!
January 16th, 2008
Posted by
TLR |
Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development, Supervision and Management |
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Today I received an email from my retired Denver Police Officer’s group, on behalf of Laverne Knight, whose husband, retired detective Bob Knight, is having some serious medical issues. A neighbor is making a memory book for Bob, and Laverne asked if officers could contribute funny stories or photos. I don’t have a funny story to contribute, but I certainly have a wonderful memory of Bobby Knight. It’s one I have talked about in many classes when I mention the positive impact we can have on others.
I was a “police woman,” newly hired in 1969, and assigned to the Delinquency Control Division as an investigator. (How is that for an outdated sounding police division?) I was more of a curiosity than a welcomed addition, although almost everyone was friendly. On my second day I was in Sergeant John Leavitt’s office when he called Detective Knight in and asked him to take me with him when he conducted some interviews. Detective Knight said sure, he’d be happy to take me along. That alone made him my hero! I don’t know how old he was then (probably early 30’s to my 23), but I thought he was the most sophisticated, mature, urbane, well-dressed detective in the division!
We went to the downtown May D&F department store to interview a clerk about a sizeable shoplifting incident. Detective Knight started to interview her, but stopped, turned to me and said, “Why don’t you do this one?” I was incredibly nervous and my heart was pounding, but I tried to act as though I had interviewed lots and lots of people in my lengthy career!
After I was done, he finished with a few questions and we left. As we went down the escalator he said, “You did a good job. I think you’re going to like being a detective and you’ll do well at it.” I was thrilled to hear him say that, and I said, “I tried my best! Do you REALLY think I did fine?” He smiled and said, “Well, no. Not fine. But good.” That was still a great thing for me to hear, and I called my mom long-distance when I got home, to tell her that a brilliant detective had complimented me!
Ironically, in my career I was a patrol officer, technician, sergeant, lieutenant, captain and a United States Marshal, but I never had the title of Detective! Nevertheless, I have often told that story about Detective Bob Knight, to remind people of the instant impact we can have–either positively or negatively–on those who look to us for support, encouragement, approval, guidance or leadership. Detective Knight is still a hero of mine!
January 15th, 2008
Posted by
TLR |
Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development |
2 comments
Many people like Bruschetta (correctly pronounced brus-ketta–but most people say brew-shetta). It’s grilled or toasted bread, drizzled with olive oil, maybe rubbed with garlic, and topped with tomatoes, cheese and/or peppers. Sort of a toast pizza!
My warmed tomato dish is much more simple, but just as tasty to me–and only about 80 calories for a good-sized tomato with a bit of oil.
Thinly slice one or more regular, or three or four Roma, tomatoes and arrange them on a saucer. Drizzle just a teeny bit of flavored oil (I use a dipping oil) on each slice. You could even leave off the oil if you want. Sprinkle with a bit of dried oregano and basil, or for a real treat use fresh, finely diced herbs. Sprinkle with coarse salt and pepper, to taste. (I like lots of salt!) Warm in the microwave for about 45 seconds, until quite warm but not hot. That’s all there is to it. But I think it’s delicious!
I could put a slice of mozzarella cheese on the saucer or add bread, but that would defeat my purpose of having a very, very low calorie snack. Last week I had twenty Roma tomatoes to use up, and this is how I ate every one of them!
This might not be considered highly professional for a training journal. But doggone it, we have to eat!
January 14th, 2008
Posted by
TLR |
Food, Fitness, Fun |
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The old adage is, “In our greatest strengths are the seeds of our greatest weaknesses.” I am regularly reminded about that truth, and chagrined to see it fully and regularly demonstrated in my behavior. In fact, I think it’s safe to say that there are no seeds of weaknesses in my life, there are full grown trees with strong roots!
I’m developing a class about interviewing employee candidates, as well as conducting supervisory interviews for other reasons. I want to mention the old hackneyed interview question: “What is your greatest strength and what is your greatest weakness?” It’s very difficult for most people to answer truthfully, with something like: “My strength is that I am smarter than almost anyone–and incredibly good looking. My weakness is a little problem I have with pornography.” So, they give answers that are as trite as the question, and designed to make themselves sound good: “My strength is that I am humble, and my weakness is that, darn it, sometimes I care too much about people and work.”
If you get disgusted with yourself when you fall short of what you know you can be and do, try this reverse approach: “In my weaknesses are the seeds of some tremendous strengths that I want to cultivate.”
I don’t think there is much point in us trying to completely eliminate our weaknesses. For one thing, have you noticed that some people have found those to be charming? Nevertheless, we can cultivate, nurture and display our strengths so they overshadow–if not choke-out–the behaviors that create problems for us and others.
January 13th, 2008
Posted by
TLR |
Life and Work |
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I received an email from a supervisor this morning, wanting to know how to handle a situation where someone she supervises is treating her very coolly because she had to say no to a request. The employee isn’t saying anything obvious, just shutting down any friendly interaction.
The signs are obvious:
She won’t make eye contact unless forced to; she gets quiet when the supervisor walks into the area; she answers questions as briefly as possible; she seems withdrawn in general.
This office is a small one and tense feelings are obvious, so people were asking both her and the employee what was going on. Some supervisors wouldn’t care, but this one did because she knows how something like that can grow to the point that eventually a barrier is raised that never comes down.
The most common response to such actions is to give the employee the cold shoulder right back. Why be nice if they want to act like a child, right? Another response is to laugh about it as though you not only don’t care, but you actually think it’s funny: “Did you see Stella turn her back on me today? I walked around to the other side and she turned again. I almost did it a few more times just to watch her swivel in her chair!” Some supervisors will set up the employee to force them to be rude, just to show others how petulant the employee is acting. A few will talk to the employee about it, to try to explain their actions and get the employees to see their viewpoint. Some might tell the employee to stop sulking, or they will direct improved behavior in some other way.
The best response, like most “best” responses, is the one that works for the people and the setting–and those things vary. However, generally the best solution to this and other conflict situations is to ask yourself, “What do I want as a final result?”
I doubt that any supervisor wants a permanent barrier between himself or herself and an employee, especially over a relatively small matter. Most supervisors would want the relationship to be comfortable again, with the office back to normal and not focused on this conflict. That eliminates the options of a return cold shoulder, making fun of the situation or setting up the employee in some way.
On the other hand, it’s not a good idea to go to an employee in a supplicant mode to ask them to understand your motives and be nice to you again. (I’ve heard supervisors almost beg in that way!) Nor is it likely to get good results to brusquely tell an employee to straighten up and act right. That doesn’t improve working relationships, it just shows who has authority. Some employees might realize they’ve overstepped their boundaries and would change their behavior, but some employees would be antagonized even further.
Some general guidelines that seem to help in these situations:
1. Don’t let communications lapse. (I used to think letting the supervisor and the employee have some breathing room was a good idea, but I’ve repeatedly seen negative results from that) You don’t have to force conversation, just ensure that you don’t diminish the level of communication you would normally have. If possible, try to increase it somewhat. If you aren’t communicating, the employee has time to brood, talk to others, say negative things he or she will regret, and increase their sense of ill-treatment from you. If you are in and out of their work area, talking, asking questions and listening to their answers, you will help them keep moving forward with work. Be sensitive to how they feel about whatever issue caused the problem, but keep focused on work.
2. Don’t let the cool treatment go on for more than a day or two at the maximum. It’s probably too much to expect that an employee will bounce back in an hour or two. However, after a day or so, the employee’s professionalism and/or maturity should help them move past the situation that caused them to be upset. If that isn’t happening, meet with the employee, in your area or the employee’s work area, and use a direct but not angry approach. Have a conversation with a concerned tone of voice, in which you say what you’ve noticed and why it’s a problem: ”Chris, since Tuesday, you’ve acted different than usual–not talking, not making eye contact, not responding when I talk to you. It takes everyone’s focus off work and puts it on the tense situation. Is this a result of the discussion about you going to the conference?” (If you ask what’s the matter you probably won’t get the answer anyway, so you might as well be direct!)
3. Listen with interest not irritation. If Chris denies acting differently, you will have brought the situation to his attention. If he admits he’s frustrated and angry, you have that to work with. If he says his actions have been caused by something else, you can discuss that.
One supervisor told me that he really works to apply the Golden Rule at this point, knowing that he would probably want to try to present his own views again, if he was the employee. So, if an employee starts rehashing an argument, he listens, then reminds the employee that the decision wasn’t made lightly and the issue has been decided. He said many employees have smiled ruefully and told him they figured it was worth a try!
4. Briefly acknowledge whatever the employee states is the cause of his or her behavior–maybe something as brief as, “I thought that might be it.” The employee may make-up something to account for the actions, but that’s OK, if it will get you to a better situation. Then, be clear about what behavior is appropriate: “Well, Chris, when one person acts angry or upset it has an affect on everyone, and makes it hard to talk to you about work or anything else. I want you and I to be able to talk comfortably. Can we get back to that now?”
There are probably better ways to say it than that–that’s just a way that worked for me on occasion, so I’m using it as an example. The point is to be honest, direct and clear about your wishes, but without sounding angry yourself. If you’re asking the employee to act professionally, you should do the same.
5. Continue your normal communications with everyone, including with that employee. You probably won’t need to mention the situation again, just keep going on with work as usual.
6. Let the other employees see that things are better. Look for ways to show that communications are comfortable again. Most employee are glad when things are back to normal.
The key to handling tense situations is to have a relationship of trust going into it. You can’t have a short conversation that works well, if you’ve never talked to the employee personally before. You won’t get a good response if the employee knows you’ve been bad-mouthing him or her. You won’t be successful at keeping the lines of communication open if no one trusts you or believes you.
The next time you have a situation where the actions of someone toward you are frustrating, irritating or concern you, ask yourself what you want to see as a final positive result, then work toward that.
January 11th, 2008
Posted by
TLR |
Supervision and Management |
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I’ve talked about having a blog format website for months–even years. But there has been one huge barrier to getting it done: Me.
I tend to procrastinate anyway, so that hasn’t helped. Plus, I didn’t want to keep a journal in the literal sense. Primarily I wanted to share and compare thoughts about the areas in which I train and present. And, I had felt if I couldn’t produce something like the best of the others I’ve seen, I didn’t want to do it. (I’m over that now.) Then, there is the ongoing issue of having limited time for writing brilliant entries. (I’m over that illusion, too.) Another issue is that I wanted to combine a business website with a blog, but didn’t want it to seem like either. That is why I’m calling this a training journal.
For years I’ve told people that one day I’d have a way for them to contact me, find out about training and presentations and share thoughts about supervision, leadership, personal and professional development, favorite quotations and interesting trivia–including the trivia of some of my activities. However, in spite of thinking about doing it, talking about doing it, wanting to do it, being encouraged to do it and knowing I needed to do it for business reasons, it never happened.
This is the first entry, and before long I’ll be able to say (casually, as though it’s a minor detail and I don’t want any fuss or bally-hoo over it) “Yeah, I have an online training journal. Check it out if you want to. No big deal. Just something I threw together in 1,356.5 hours.” There will be changes over time–some of them over the next few days and weeks–but I’m hoping to keep it simple with the primary goal of posting regularly.
Thank you Dr. Jeff Adams www.drjeffadams.com for your encouragement. Really, you were the one who made it happen. Cheryl, you will undoubtedly get a crown in Heaven for your patience when I’ve called Jeff so often. Also, thank you Shannon, Casey, and Larry, for listening to me fidget about this project.
Thank you Dr. William Gorden of the Ask The Workplace Doctors website www.workplacedoctors.com as well as Robert Adams (aka Pastor Bulldog) http://bulldogs-are-survivors.blogspot.com, and my very young, older brother, Julian Lewis, for demonstrating the importance of gaining and using technological saavy, even past the time of having a career need for it.
Thank you Troy Vitullo of Troy Vitullo Consulting, who has been doing web consulting since 1997. Check him out at www.troyvit.com. Troy has been a great source of advice about this project as well as other website development issues I’ve had. He must think I’m the biggest idiot in the world, but he’s never once acted like it.
Thank you Mark, Ava, Hutch, Angela, Rich, Pat, Patty, Darrin, Letty, Dean, Janet, Karen, Sharon, Tom and Gail, and especially Marcia, who have proven to be wonderful sources of support and fun over time–and to whom I’ll refer often, and also use you as guest contributors now and then. I think that will add to the usefulness of the site, and give you something to do with your idle hours.
Now do your duty: Read regularly, comment often and forward the link to your hundred or so dearest friends.
Someone suggested that I develop a catch-phrase to close every entry, but that doesn’t work well for me. So, this first entry will close with a quote most of you have heard me use many times. Thomas Carlysle said it in the 1800’s and it’s still true:
“Blessed is he who has found his work. Let him ask no other blessedness.” If you found your work and can still find reasons to enjoy it, you ARE truly blessed. Share your positive feelings with others–that’s what I’m hoping to do with this blog training journal! ###
January 11th, 2008
Posted by
Tina |
Technology, Blogs, A/V etc. |
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