Enjoy The Good Old Days!

1970

These aren’t the worst of times, just as they are not the best of times. Without diminishing the severity of national and international problems, perhaps we can take some comfort–and gain some hope–from the fact that we have not only endured similar crises, we have survived and eventually thrived again. It is true that every crisis has the potential for weakening individuals and governments, but there is also an opportunity to gain strength, correct mistakes and build on successes.

Apply it to your life. The same concept applies to your workplace, community, church and family. There will be problems. The big test is how you respond to the problems. You can keep doing the same things as always, without being willing to adjust to changes. You can go the same heedless way you have in the past, hoping for a magical solution from someone else. Or, you can take control of your own fate as much as possible.

Do what you can do: Build your skills, eliminate harmful habits, gain influence, increase your credibility, use your time and energy more wisely, improve your health and fitness, enjoy life more and help others find happiness and success as well.

1984

You probably have very little control over many things that have an effect on your life, but you do have control over your behavior. You may not be able to make major changes at work but you can improve your own performance. You can’t make the whole world better but you can make your part of the world better. That’s not just a saccharine thought, it’s a truth you can depend upon–and one that will accomplish more than complaining, venting, or feeling helpless or morose.

In 2040 there will be magazine covers deploring the condition of the economy, uncovering a recent scandal in the White House, and announcing the high cost of health care, the lamentable status of education and the challenges of  new technologies. (Those holographic images will be distracting at work!)

2010 will soon be the good old days. Enjoy them while you can!

1974

July 23rd, 2010 Posted by TLR | Keeping On!, Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development | 9 comments

Monitoring The Nail Supply

 For Want Of A Nail
For want of a nail, a shoe was lost,
For want of a shoe, a horse was lost,
For want of a horse, a rider was lost,
For want of a rider, a message was lost,
For want of a message, a battle was lost,
For want of a battle, a kingdom was lost,
All for the want of a horseshoe nail.

 

Advice about workplace motivation often suggests purposely assigning a challenging task as a way to  help an employee become more enthusiastic.  It will probably be more useful to the employee and the organization to help him or her see that the regular work they were hired to do is worth doing and worth doing well.

When employees only feel energized when they are engaged in new, unique or special projects, there is a tendency to feel let-down when those projects are completed. Routine tasks then seem even less significant than before. Make it as worthwhile and satisfying for employees to do routine tasks well, as it is for them to accept and fulfill a great challenge.

While you are at it, remember that observing and acknowledging dependable, daily task accomplishment is part of your routine work–and just as valuable as a project that tests your abilities in a dramatic way.

You may never be responsible for leading the battle that saves the kingdom, or riding with the message that saves the battle, or even shoeing the horse that carries the rider. Nevertheless, do not underestimate the value of being the one who monitors the supply of nails.

July 15th, 2010 Posted by TLR | Personal and Professional Development, Supervision and Management | 4 comments

Spite and Malice–Only Fun As A Card Game

Spite and malice harms everyone and should be stopped.

Whether you are a manager, supervisor, employee, parent, sibling, friend or just want to be a decent human being, be on the alert for indicators of mean-spirited, petty, maliciously vile behavior. Don’t do it yourself and don’t ignore it in others.

The card game, Spite and Malice, has been around for a long time under a variety of names. It can be fun to play when played in the spirit of fun, even though it certainly appeals to the competitive spririt as well. It’s described on one site as “a game with attitude.”  One reviewer commented on the fun of playing the “Stop anyone” card, when you see someone is on a winning streak. Another said, “This is a cutthroat game where you do what it takes to keep someone from winning, then they do it back to you.”  The Hasboro card box says, “If you can’t beat’em, annoy’em.” It sounds like some workplaces I’ve heard about!

At  work, these are often the indicators of spiteful, malicious behavior:

• Sarcastic, snide remarks to diminish someone or their work.
• Behavior or comments designed to make it difficult for someone to do their work effectively.
• Waiting until others are around to point out a mistake or problem.
• Doing something you know will result in a bad situation for someone else.
• Facial expressions, gestures, comments or actions that cause someone else to feel unwanted, disliked, or demeaned.
• Frequently ridiculing or mocking someone rather than talking to them directly about a problem or issue.
• Being an obstructionist and stubbornly resisting someone else, just to avoid complying or just to create a problem for them.  (This is also a description of passive-aggressive behavior.)
• Stabbing someone in the back and twisting the knife. (That’s a high-level psychological phrase.)

Spiteful, malicious behavior is a clear indicator of ongoing contention that harms everyone, even those who are not the direct target. It uses time ineffectively and often results in long, long meetings or frequent cross-purpose conversations that get no positive results. It creates tension and ill-will. It’s nasty. Even if there is someone who seems to be deserving of a slap-down or a put-down or a straightening-up, it isn’t the appropriate way to improve things.

If you are a manger or supervisor and you hear or observe something that seems malicious or spiteful: Stop the behavior immediately, investigate it further and if you were correct in your observations, direct the employee to never do it again. Make it clear that the behavior was not useful, not professional and not acceptable. If there was provocation, deal with that as well. But, make sure the petty, vengeful behavior stops.

If you are the target of spite and malice: Don’t respond with more of it. Get it out in the open and let the other person know you heard it or felt it. See if you can deal with the underlying problem. Find out if you have created part of the problem. If that doesn’t help, document what happened and the effect it had on you and others and ask for assistance in getting it stopped. Don’t drop hints, act like a long-suffering victim or gossip about the other person, just ask for help in a reasonable way.

Some good comments when confronting directly:
“You say that as though you’re joking, but I don’t think you mean it that way. How do you mean it?”

“It seems as though you are purposely resisting this. Is it because of me or because of the idea or both?”

“It seems like there is some hidden message in what you’re saying. If you talk to me directly maybe we can get things in the open and deal with it.”

If you are tempted to be malicious or spiteful: One indicator of spite and malice is sneaky, behind the scenes, manipulative behavior designed to harm someone else. But you can also be nasty and mean right out in the open. A good test is this: What results are you trying to get?

If you are trying to make life difficult for someone else or trying to harm them or their work in some way, stop yourself before someone else has to stop you. Find the root cause for your feelings of anger or agression and deal with those issues.

The bottom line: No one ever looked more professional after showing spite or malice. No one has ever brought about positive changes through malicious or spiteful behavior. Stop it when you observe it and don’t do it yourself.

In card games it can be fun to block other players in every hand they play, while chortling to yourself or openly about it. At work, the stakes are too high to play those kind of games.

July 7th, 2010 Posted by TLR | Challenging and Problematic People, Personal and Professional Development, Supervision and Management | 8 comments

Sail On, O Ship of State!

Fourth of July, 2010

The term Ship of State has been used as a metaphor for the governing body of a country since Plato wrote The Republic, in 380 B.C.  Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882) wrote a lengthy–and very metaphorical!–poem, Building the Ship, about the union of states that formed the United States.

The most well-known lines of that poem are the last few stanzas, which are particularly appropriate this 4th of July. There is no hysteria about how bad things are or might be in the future and there is no mean-spirited nastiness about the storms that shake the ship. There is only resoluteness, confidence and positive will. Even if you don’t usually read poetry, give this a try.  

Building the Ship

Thou, too, sail on, O Ship of State!
Sail on, O Union, strong and great!
Humanity with all its fears,
With all the hopes of future years,
Is hanging breathless on thy fate!
We know what Master laid the keel,
What Workmen wrought thy ribs of steel,
Who made each mast, and sail, and rope,
What anvils rang, what hammers beat,
In what forge and what a heat
Were shaped the anchors of thy hope!
Fear not each sudden sound and shock,
‘Tis of the wave and not the rock;
‘Tis but the flapping of the sail,
And not a rent made by the gale!
In spite of rock and tempest’s roar,
In spite of false lights on the shore,
Sail on, nor fear to breast the sea!
Our hearts, our hopes, are all with thee,
Our hearts, our hopes, our prayers, our tears,
Our faith triumphant o’er our fears,
Are all with thee, – are all with thee!

Have a very fun–but thoughtful, hopeful and memory-making–July 4th, 2010!

July 2nd, 2010 Posted by TLR | Life and Work | 3 comments

What Are The Best Tests For Hiring and Promotion?

Can you tell by looking?

In 1917, William F. Kemble, an engineer who was engaged in introducing standardized hiring and promotional tests for business and industry, wrote Choosing Employees By Test. (Industrial Management Library, The Engineering Magazine Company. New York.) Kemble was a strong advocate of the scientific and mathematical approach to business and industry. This was at a time when large businesses were using efficiency experts, vocationalists and labor standardizers--early versions of Human Resources staff.

Mr. Kemble believed that almost all knowledge, skills and aptitudes could be determined by a series of written and physical tests which could be administered in a relatively short amount of time and used as a basis for hiring and promotion.  Some of his ideas will sound familiar:

If employers so desire, the initial record found by the tests given to each applicant may be followed up by monthly reports of work accomplishments, all reduced to a card system. Upon these records can be based many decisions about employment, raises or promotions which would otherwise be done by guesswork or favoritism.

Unfortunately he mixed science and his personal opinions a great deal.  One of his tests involved having candidates for an executive position answer questions about the potential of scientific and engineering accomplishments. (Could there be a building ten times taller than the Woolworth Building? Will man ever be able to tunnel from Alaska to Asia? Will wireless power ever be developed for areoplanes? Will gold ever be transmuted from base metal?) The results of the tests as well as the way candidates acted as they were taking it, were ranked in this way: Idiot, Chaotic, Normal, Intelligent, Executive. (Which would you be?)

One of Kemble’s supposedly scientific tests involved comparing a photograph of a potential employee to lists of “common physical manifestations of mental and moral characteristics.” In this way he believed he could tell if a person was intelligent, a drunkard, petulant, lazy, moral, in good health, good with mathematics or any of dozens of other traits. He assigned points to each facial characterisic so the overall intelligence or morality of an applicant could be given a numerical rating.

The full-face and profile photos at the top of this article are part of such a test. He knew the people in the photographs and had a sample of one hundred good salesmen guess the answers to his questions. They had a 66% to 79% correct response rate. Thus, he reasoned, a potential salesperson should have a similarly correct rate of response.

These were the characteristics applicants matched to the photographs:

• Quick in action.
• Irritable.
• Healthy.
• Very temperate in drink.
• Constant church goer.
• Business person.
• Artistic.
• Saves money.
• Highly educated.
• Industrious worker.

Sadly for me, the correct answers weren’t provided! What do you think?

Kemble’s book has recently been scanned and published by Nabu Press, as having historical significance. However, I have an original edition, which I found in one of my old-book hunts years ago. It has 333 pages of small print, all focused on what he was sure was the future of employment testing. Some of it was logical and accurate and much of it was not.  He apparently did not write another book and also did not make enough of a mark on the world of business that he is cited in other sources. I feel badly about that because he sounded so earnest, dedicated and convinced. As a result, I wanted to honor him here by sharing his photo and a little bit about his work.  I hope he had a happy life, contributed to the happiness of the lives of others and felt he was successful. I wish that for you, too!

William Fretz Kemble
1874-?

June 26th, 2010 Posted by TLR | Assessment Centers and Interviews, Personal and Professional Development, Supervision and Management, Training, Technology, Blogs, A/V etc. | 7 comments

Be The One Who Makes Good Things Happen

You’ll hear these remarks often in meetings or business conversations:

“I wish we could do that.”
“Maybe we can do that one of these days.”
“I sure wish they would do that.”
“I’ll have to try to get that started sometime.”
“I don’t think there is anything we can do about that.”
“There’s no way I can make it better.”
“I’d love to help you, but I’m low level in the business.”
“It’s a good idea but I’m sure they wouldn’t approve it.”

What if the conversations sounded like this, instead:
“I’ll get started on it.”
“Give me a month and it’ll be done.”
“You have my word on it. I’ll make it happen.”
“I’m going to give it my best effort, you can bet on that.”
“I’ll do something about it the minute I hang up the phone.”

Putting Your Leadership To The Test

It seems that we toss the concept of leadership around a lot.  Many people read books on leadership, talk about it, lament that there isn’t more of it and fancy that they are leaders. In promotional processes, nothing is more common than to hear a candidate say he or she takes a leadership role. The interview panel thinks: “Oh yeah? What have you done that has led others to something good?”

So, that can be a test of your leadership in your corner of the world: What have you done lately to make good things happen? What you done to move an idea from concept to reality? What you done to facilitate, champion or do the tough work for a project that is worthwhile?

Of course, there are situations where we suggest or try and are told no. There may be good reasons for that or not. However, more often, we don’t even try–we anticipate the no. Or, we wait for someone else to make things happen, then we support them. Or, we procrastinate until after the holidays or after vacation or after the budget gets approved or whatever. If there is something you can help make happen–do it now. I used the photo above, of am Amish farmer plowing a field, because I am so often reminded that everyone wants a bumper crop but few want to get behind the plow, be the plow, or pull the plow.

Brian Hill of Mental Ammo Made Things Happen.

Last year I was contacted by Brian Hill, about conducting an advanced instructor class for his organization.  Brian also has his own website and does training and consulting. He didn’t know me and had no particular reason to ensure he made things happen for the training—but he did. On his own he made the contacts, did the convincing and set things up. Then, he followed through with all the details involved. He did an outstanding job and I appreciated it all very much.

Brian could have talked about the training for months or years. He could have said it was a shame the inspirational and fascinating speaker and trainer, Tina Lewis Rowe, hadn’t been asked to present the class. (I put that in bold, so a search bot might pick it up.) He could have put it on his “To Do” list and done nothing. Instead, he moved forward, made the effort and showed his leadership. And the class was great!

What Can You Make Happen?

It’s easy for us to talk big about what we could do, could do and might do. The big question is: What have you done and what is in the works? Another question is: What have you vaguely promised you might try to get accomplished but so far have done nothing about?

Starting today and in the future, you be the one who makes things happen.

June 18th, 2010 Posted by TLR | Assessment Centers and Interviews, Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers, Supervision and Management | 8 comments

KSAs and KSAEs

How Effective Are You? That’s What Counts!

You have heard of KSAs: Knowlege, Skills and Attitudes. Those are the Domains of Learning, developed from the work of Benjamin Bloom in the 1950s–and still being refined. The levels within each group provide the basis for learning objectives, lesson plans, tests, job descriptions and performance evaluations.

KSAs Aren’t Enough

You would think if someone could analyze, evaluate and create (the highest levels of knowledge), had mastery over work skills (the highest levels of skills) and consistently was positive and and focused on doing well (characterizing, which is the highest level of attitudes) that he or she would be successful at work. Unfortunately, as you know, there are people who fit all of those descriptions, but who nevertheless are not effective–and effective is what counts.

Someone was telling me about a coworker who is knowledgeable about many aspects of her work and skillful in many ways as well.  She is highly motivated and believes in the power of positive thinking.  The only thing that keeps her from being as successful as she would like is this: She isn’t effective. People don’t like to work with her; she creates problems wherever she goes; she is a source of irritation and frustration for many people. She doesn’t get more work done, she reduces the amount and quality of work. Another woman was described to me recently as being knowledgeable and skillful with a great attitude–but she sometimes seems disorganized and unfocused mentally and doesn’t inspire the confidence she merits.

I know a man who is a tremendous source of knowledge about many things. He has the talent and skill to write, speak, find problems and develop solutions and do a wide range of mechanical, mathematical and written work. He has a strong set of values from which he never wavers. But, he consistently has problems where he works because he is often engaged in a conflict with someone. He is viewed as ineffective and a liablity.

KSAs (Knowledge, Skills and Attitudes) must be supplemented with traits and behaviors in order to result in effectiveness. Certainly there are those who are so brilliant or talented that their weird traits or obnoxious behavior is tolerated. But even those people usually have effective staff who negotiate the contracts and soothe the conflicts stirred up by their clients.  (And you and I are not so brilliant and talented that we will be tolerated.)

Effectiveness is Habit-Forming or Vice Versa

The argument could be made that the traits and behaviors to which I refer are actually skills: interpersonal skills, communication skills, conflict resolution skills, self-control and self-development skills.  Or, that they reflect a lack of appropriate attitudes or an excess of an otherwise positive attitude. That is all true. But, some aspect of effectiveness involves style, approaches and habits. There is a reason the famous book refers to Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, rather than Seven KSAs of Highly Effective People.

Test Your Effectiveness

So, how can you know whether you possess the E to go with your KSAs? These are a mix of questions, but perhaps they can help you decide if you are being as effective as you’d like to be:

1. Are you achieving your professional goals or do you feel held back often?
2. Do you have the enthusiastic support of most of the important people in your work world?  
3. Can you point to significant accomplishments that matter to those above you in the business?
4. Do coworkers who are generally respected and not known for pettiness, distance themselves from you?
5. Do you get asked to help or do you have to push yourself into groups or committees?
6. Do you find yourself needing to self-market to overcome your reputation?
7. If most of your coworkers and immediate supervisors were asked, would they commend your work effectiveness?
8. Have others hinted to you–or come right out and said–that your work habits create problems for them and you?
9. Does it seems that the people who are most impressed with you don’t work closely with you–and those who are least impressed, do?
10. Do you get thanked often for how effective you are or do you have to tell people to make sure they know?

It could be that those who are least effective will not recognize their deficiencies. However, honest self-appraisal could help all of us find the areas in which we are least effective, even if we think we’re not as problematic as those people. Or, you may feel glad to consider how well things are going. If that’s the case, thank the people who are helping you be effective.

The bottom line: If you feel sure you possess a high level of KSAs but you don’t seem to be effective, put your focus on identifying and improving problem traits and behaviors. That is what allows your KSAs to become high levels of KSAEs.

June 10th, 2010 Posted by TLR | Life and Work, Personal and Professional Development, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers | 8 comments

How Do You Want To Remember Summer, 2010?

Make Wonderful Memories This Summer!

Officially, it isn’t summer until June 21st.  For most of us it becomes summer when we no longer have to worry about snow or school. Here in Colorado we can finally say with the poet, James Russell Lowell, “…what is so rare as a day in June? Then, if ever, come perfect days.”

What are you going to do with these perfect days? And what about July and August? I don’t want to be depressing–but you only have about 90 days before you will probably start noticing that it’s no longer summer–it’s approaching autumn.  What can you do in the next 90 days to make Summer, 2010 the best ever?

Cherish the summer memories that have meant the most to you.  What have been some of the best summers of your life? What are some sights, sounds, smells, tastes and experiences that will always be linked with summer in your mind and heart? (One of mine is of eating watermelon on newspaper on the front porch. Another is the smell of Russian-olive trees and talking on the patio until it got dark.) Is there any way to recreate or share some parts of your best memories?

Enjoy the mornings and evenings. Make the most of the extra hours of warmth, light and bird-songs. Eat breakfast outside. Take the kids (or yourself) for a late evening picnic in a park or in your own yard, on your porch or just the steps. They’ll never forget it!

Make the ordinary seem special. Turn off most of the lights and use candles at dinner; go for walks and purposefully observe the natural world; chill glasses for sun tea; turn off the air conditioner now and then and open windows all the way; make a homemade salad dressing; take your time organizing your garage and make it an interesting, satisfying task instead drudgery you have to finish in a weekend.

Be joyful. Appreciate, say thank you, smile, glow.  Even as you sweat while mowing your lawn or working in your garden, be grateful for having a lawn and garden. If you are happy to not have a lawn or garden, mail thank you cards to people you know or don’t know who have worked hard on their flowers or lawns.  Notice the workers who make flower displays look so lovely in public settings. Tell them thank you, then write to their employers and express your appreciation–or write to the organization paying for the landscaping and let them know you appreciate their efforts.  

Be your most healthful self. Feel better than ever by eating lightly, exercising more and drinking plenty of water. In 90 days you can create a new you or make the currently good you even better. Don’t make it tough work, make it a fun way to celebrate the summer.

Take photos. Promise yourself to chronicle Summer, 2010 with snapshots of people not just scenery. Let them pose and smile or pause and smile, so both you and they will be happy with the results. Take your camera with you everywhere and have people take a photo of you with your family. If you’re on your own, ask someone who looks trustworthy to take your picture. (That will keep you from having every picture show you with your arm outstretched as you photograph yourself!)

Think about how you want to remember Summer, 2010–
then make it happen every day.

The seasons of the year are like the seasons of life–we have no control over their inevitability, just as we don’t have full control over some of the things that bring sorrow, stress or strain on even the sunniest of days. Finding strength may be easier if you can  absorb the sunshine, beauty and freshness of all that is around you.

If you are blessed enough to have days without personal tragedy, sorrow or worry, reach out to those who do and help them in any way you can. At work and elsewhere, strengthen relationships while you strengthen your life. Summer is the perfect time for it.

Probably the key to happiness this summer or any other time is to be aware of all it offers and use it well, so you can say:                                                                               

“The summer of 2010 was wonderful! That was when I……..”  

The poet Celia Thaxter said, “There shall be eternal summer in the grateful heart.”
Have a wonderful summer and make every moment an opportunity for happy, grateful memories!

June 3rd, 2010 Posted by TLR | Life and Work | 8 comments

John Mollison Interviews Old Guys and Draws Their Planes

Lt. Col. Don Bryan, an Ace with the famous 352nd Fighter Group and John Mollison, Writer and Draw-er

The North American A-36 Apache. This was flown by Col. William T. "Bill" Creech, who flew 302 combat missions in WWII, Korea and Viet Nam. He wrote a book about all of that and more: The 3rd Greatest Fighter Pilot. It's available through authorhouse.com.

Eugene "Red" James flew the F4U-42 Corsair on display at the National Naval Aviation Museum in Pensacola, Florida. "Red" flew 136 combat missions in WWII and Korea. See the art on the nose of the plane? That signifiies being in the elite group, "The Checkerboarders."

Making Every Day A Memorial Day

A  few months back I met (by email) John Mollison, who had read an article I posted about the Burma Road. John is a a military historian and a tremendously gifted artist who uses that gift in an equally tremendous way. He draws, in meticulous detail, the planes of WW II pilots and gives them as thank you gifts for allowing him to interview them. 

John’s website is one of those that can take you days to fully explore–and you’ll go back for more.  John is modest and insists there are artists who draw in much more detail than he does–and he may be correct. But you can feel the caring in his work and I like that.  Check out the website here. 

I also found a neat article in a Pensacola newspaper about one of the subjects John interviewed, Eugene “Red” James. You can read it here.  

 On Memorial Day we honor our departed loved ones and we give special honor to all those who served in the United States Armed Forces. John Mollison honors our living WWII and Korean Conflict heroes and learns from them as well. On his website he says:

A question most-often asked is, “What’s the big thing you get out of all these interviews?”

For one, it’s a deep appreciation and looking-forward to growing old.   When I was born, the men I’ve interviewed were older than I am now. To put another way, they have an entire lifetime of wisdom and learning over me…and it shows.

Yet, these men are lively, vibrant, students of learning, humble and, in a few cases, could probably kick my butt if push came to shove.

 I look forward to aging like they have- strong, sharp and alive.

 And hopefully, the study of History will become more valued.  Living in the past is silly, but you have to admit that it points in fairly reliable directions.

I enjoy all of John Mollison’s website, but especially enjoy the photos of him and some of the pilots he has interviewed. You can check that page here. They look like people I would love to meet myself, so I envy John. I not only envy him his talent, I envy the creativity and thoughtfulness he has shown by using his talent to enrich the lives of others. He makes every day a Memorial Day. That is a good idea for all of us.

May 26th, 2010 Posted by TLR | Life and Work, Training, Technology, Blogs, A/V etc. | 14 comments

Keeping The Fun In Office Birthday Celebrations

Many offices have parties to celebrate birthdays. Some celebrate on the actual day while larger offices may have a party day once a month to celebrate for everyone born that month. Still others go out to lunch or do something else  in honor of the birthday person. (I tend to think the it’s mostly a way for everyone to take a cake break.)

As fun as these can sometimes be, they also can create problems that could have been avoided with a few guidelines, requirements and limitations.

1. Let employees develop the guidelines, using established criteria or with final approval by the manager.  It’s good to let employees decide about events that pertain directly to them, but the outcome is still the responsibility of the manager.

Sometimes employees aren’t thinking of the big picture or don’t have the insight to know what could be problematic. For example, a suggestion in one office was for each employee to take turns hosting an event–but that can’t be required and may not be possible for everyone. Another office wanted to do a fun “Old Folks Home” theme for an older employee. NOT a good idea. One group wanted to require a sizable monthly donation for parties.  And, I very clearly recall the disciplinary action that followed a Male Strip-O-Gram for a female employee’s birthday.

2. Keep celebrations as simple and inexpensive as possible. The more simple and the less expensive the party, the less set-up and clean-up time is involved and the less money has to be gotten from an office fund, individual contributions or the pockets of managers and supervisors.

Consider really tasty cookies, simple cupcakes, the least expensive source for the cake, a plain fruit tray or one that is made at work. Or, do as some offices do and eliminate a food event altogether, focusing instead on verbal and written birthday wishes.

3. Have equitable parties. It can be embarrassing and hurtful to have a giant party for Betty but only a few cupcakes in the break room for Barbara. Or, to take Bill to lunch but not do anything for Bob. The best way keep it even is to do about the same thing for everyone, every time. If the employee has special dietary needs, get a small serving for the honoree but the usual thing for everyone else.

There is a gorgeous office-wrapping display shown on this site (and I really like the site too!) It looks lovely and probably was fun. However, I am aware of a similar situation in which the next employee with a birthday ( a very nice person who was well-liked) arrived at work expecting something similar, only to find everyone had been too busy to do it. She shrugged it off in front if everyone, but it hurt her terribly and made the other employee feel badly too. 

4. Don’t let birthday celebrations become a reason for conflict. Many people do not like having their cubicles decorated or having similar complicated birthday activities.  Ask ahead of time if someone is OK with having the usual birthday celebration. If he or she doesn’t want the celebration assure them it won’t be a lot of hoopla. If they still don’t want it, don’t try to argue them into it. 

 I’m familiar with an office where they have a birthday bash for every employee, including the ones who don’t attend their own event–and invariably there is some negative talk about the person who didn’t want a party. 

In an office I visited not long ago the manager commented that one of the employees had taken her birthday and the day after off, knowing the weekend followed, to avoid having her cubicle decorated for her 40th birthday.  “What she doesn’t realize”, the manager said with a grin, “is that we’re just going to wait until she comes back, however long that takes.”  My response was, “Good grief! You’re concerned about conflict in your office. Why do you want to create another one for no reason?”  

5. Keep focused on the spirit of the celebration. It’’s good to honor birthdays and to have a reason to smile and enjoy a break, perhaps with something good to eat.  However, like most things that are done with good intentions, birthday celebrations can create problems that outweigh the good. Keeping them simple, inexpensive, equitable and welcomed can help ensure success.

May 23rd, 2010 Posted by TLR | Food, Fitness, Fun, Life and Work, Service to Customers, Clients and Coworkers, Supervision and Management | 9 comments